Tuesday, April 01, 2003

Zen Error Messages

Julian (who also did his own) tells me they originally came from here. There are many more poems in this story than the mail I received. It also includes the authors names - so go have a look, load the banner ad and help pay for it.

Haiku poetry has strict construction rules : each poem has only 17 syllables; 5 syllables in the first, 7 in the second, 5 in the third. They are used to communicate a timeless message, often achieving a wistful, yearning and powerful insight through extreme brevity.

Here are some reinterpretations of the impersonal and unhelpful Microsoft error messages with Haiku poetry messages.

Your file was so big.
It might be very useful.
But now it is gone.

The Web site you seek
Cannot be located, but
Countless more exist.

The Tao that is seen
Is not the true Tao until
You bring fresh toner.

Stay the patient course.
Of little worth is your ire.
The network is down.

Chaos reigns within.
Reflect, repent, and reboot.
Order shall return.

A crash reduces
Your expensive computer
To a simple stone.

Program aborting:
Close all that you have worked on.
You ask far too much.

Three things are certain:
Death, taxes and lost data.
Guess which has occurred.

Windows NT crashed.
I am the Blue Screen of Death.
No one hears your screams.

You step in the stream
But the water has moved on.
This page is not here.

Yesterday it worked.
Today it is not working.
Windows is like that.

Out of memory.
We wish to hold the whole sky,
But we never will.

First snow, then silence.
This thousand-dollar screen dies
So beautifully.

Having been crashed
The document you're seeking
Must now be retyped.

Serious error,
All shortcuts have disappeared.
Screen. Mind. Both are blank.

Isn't that better than "your computer has performed an illegal operation?"

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